The Funniest Thanksgiving Yet

Oh. Man.  Thanksgiving.

This is the first year that Mr. and I have been married for the holidays, which doesn't change much for us but really just means that our respective families will now see each other more often during this time of year than they did before.  It also means that as they get more comfortable around each other the filters start to fail- you know, that thing your brain does to keep you from saying stupid crap when you are around new people that you want to impress and then when you get comfortable it stops working.  Hilarity ensues.

This year Mr.'s family hosted Thanksgiving dinner (or I should really call it Thanksgiving lunch because we ate at 1pm) at their home and they did most of the heavy cooking.  The rest of us brought rolls, side dishes, etc which I loved because I didn't have to spend hours cooking.  I was so excited to dig into my favorite foods and relax with my now large family.

The food was amazing (as always) and I did a pretty good job and keeping my portions under control so I could taste everything without being overly stuffed- something I'm very proud of, thankyouverymuch.  It's taken me almost 30 years to figure out how to not be in pain from gorging myself on Thanksgiving, what can I say?  Anyhow, so our fabulous meal was under way and small conversations around the table being had and somehow we ended up being regaled by tales from Nana (Nana is Mr.'s paternal grandmother).

Here's the thing, I have NO IDEA how this conversation started, probably because I was having my own conversations at the other end of the table, but all of a sudden Nana bursts out saying, "I do coke anywhere!  Sometimes you just need a little pick me up. When I'm tired or had a hard day I do some coke and have some candy."

SILENCE from the rest of the table.  Meanwhile I'm busting up.

Of course, Mr. and I know that Nana is referring to Coca-Cola, which is her beverage of choice and which she once told me while offering me an ice cold can, "I do almost all of my Coke in the car!".  Sometimes one's choice of verb is very important, especially when certain nouns are used.  Because it would be absurd to say, "I always have a Coke when I'm in the car," or "I will have a Coke anytime!".

She then proceeds to say, "Should I tell them what we're going to do?  Ok!  We're going to get some medical marijuana!  I was talking to my hairdresser whose boyfriend is going to start a dispensary- but right now I guess he is just a dealer since it used to not be legal- but we were talking about how it might be good for [my husband] (sic).  And did you know that now it comes in little balls, not in dime bags?  And you have to use a pipe or a bong... we used to just get it in little cigarettes- not that I did it but once or twice. And when you put it in the pipe you have to light it EACH TIME (as she mimes how to correctly light a pipe and take a hit, and then hold it in)!"

My end of the table erupted in hysterical laughter and chatter while I'm pretty sure Mr.'s mother had a complete meltdown in her own head.  The rest of the afternoon was spent telling thinly veiled pot and coke jokes (because we are SO GROWN UP!) and snacking on left overs.

I seriously wish all holidays were like this because I was sore from laughing so hard by the end of it all.   But really I am very thankful for my family (now much extended) and for Mr. who makes my life infinitely better every single day.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!